Oh dear...

Why is it that despite all of my rationalities I still get freaked out so easily?

Here's the story: For the past two months I've been putting off getting my social security number. I had decided in all my wisdom that it wasn't that high of a priority, and I was getting around to doing it.. honest!

Well, it all came to a head this past week where the secretary for my lab began sending me "URGENT: social security number needed" e-mails. Again, I stupidly ignored the seriousness of the issue, and continued to drag my feet.

In my defense, I did go to the Social Security Administration building to try and apply for my number a total of 3 times at 2 different locations. Unfortunately since I'm not a morning person, my timing would always be poor and the line up would be a ridiculous 2+ hour wait. What with my working, there was no way I could be in there for that long.

Yesterday my co-worker, Sam, found out some dirt from the HR person in charge of our hiring process when he submitted his social security number. Apparently our lab is getting audited, and so everyone within my lab is technically under scrutiny. I am a resident alien legal to work in the US, and my documents are all in order except for one tiny detail. I don't have a SSN yet. Without one, I stand the risk of being in breach of my contract, and would get deported if someone of US authority were to find out. Oh wait.. shit.

So logically all I would have to do is get my act together and apply for the damn thing. It's free of charge and processes in the database within a couple of days. I would then get my SSN card in the mail in about 2 weeks. Even if something did happen I'm sure the university could figure something out to resolve it.

I knew all of this. I knew that the next morning I would just wake up early, go downtown, and get my application submitted. So what did I do? Freak the fuck out, of course. As in I wanted to cry at work, stop everything I was doing, and just already have my SSN dammit.

*breathe*

(And a chocolate bar later)

I finished my work for the day, which took an hour longer than usual (making me end at 7:30pm) due to multiple people asking if they could use my scheduled time on the robot so that they could finish their stuff and go home. WTF. Okay yes, I am a junior researcher here and you have shiny doctoral degree but I want to go home at a reasonable hour too. So after my long day and stint of emotional eating I went to the gym for a quick run (I make some healthy decisions too alright?).

It's weird I never used to be a fan of going to the gym. I dislike the monotony of just being on a machine and not going anywhere. Usually, the only way I get exercise is if I play a sport. But oh man, these gyms have individual tv monitors embedded into each machine so I can distract myself however I want. Cable is a scarce commodity for me.

Anyways, end tangent. I got my ass out of bed this morning, waited in line downtown, and got my application submitted! Everything instantly became better. The funny thing is that along with my relief and return of gratitude for life one of the first things I though was, "Man, I feel like doing some science today".